Drabble Dribble

No time to blog?

A drabble is a 100-word story--or perhaps a 100-word anything. Aims for compression. Think of it as a gigantic haiku, but not in verse, or Japanese, or a poem. So not really a haiku at all. Anyway....

And if you're really lazy, this will generate one for you. It's a mad-lib, no less.

Here's the one it generated for me.

The Rock Prince

David was walking through a wallet-size meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around her head when she spied a worrisome little rock lying under a tree.

David skipped over to see the dear thing and was green-blue to find that he was hurt! A basket had pierced his fretful little penis and he whimpered masterfully with the pain.

"My incandescent little friend," David said. "Let me help you!" She took out her Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the basket, as nastily as she could. The rock cried out and David's heart ached, like a used condom spilling its stale seed onto the pavement under a highway overpass. "You'll be all right," David whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Margaret and you can live with me forever!"

Scooping Margaret up in her arms, David carried him home and made a bed for him beside her own. For seven days and seven nights, David nursed Margaret, cleaning his penis and feeding him Panda-brand rock chow.

On the eighth night, Margaret climbed into bed with David. He burrowed under the covers and rapidly fucked David's big toe. It made David giggle and she cuddled close to Margaret, stroking his elbow and singing fitfully to him.

They continued that way for a long time. Every day, David hurried home so she could curl up with Margaret. It gave her a mechanical feeling whenever Margaret fucked her big toe.

Then one night, Margaret looked up at David and said, "If you kiss me, I will become a lovelorn prince."

David screamed flatly, she was so surprised. How could a rock talk? She must have dropped off and dreamed it.

"You're not dreaming," Margaret said. "Kiss me."

"Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," David said and kissed Margaret on his elbow. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood a lovelorn prince! With a crown and everything!

"I'm Prince Margaret," he said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."

"Is it really you?" David said.

"See?" Margaret said and showed David the scar from the basket on his penis. Then he kissed David and they tumbled up my ass and did a lot of very oddball things, some of them involving an eager shoe.

"I love you," Margaret said when they were done. David clasped him close and they lived together happily ever after on all the prince treasure Margaret had stashed away.

And if Margaret didn't know about David's visits to the rock sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt him.

--E. R. O'Neill